9. Maybe it happened for a reason. Remember what I said about punching someone in the face with a knife? Yeah – that.
10. Just call me if you need anything. While I want to appreciate this, the fact is that people in crisis usually don’t have the ability to call, so they won’t.
Even if you don’t know someone well, you can bring them a meal, or drive them somewhere. Take the initiative.
11. I could never go through what you’re going through. Come again my friend?? This does not comfort.
A false elevation of the character and ability to cope of the person going through the crisis only serves to further wound and isolate. The one who is going through a crisis longs to be on the other side. They wake up and breathe deeply, only to remember the awful reality of their situation, and wish they didn’t have to go through it.
12. When I think of your situation, I’m reminded how blessed I am. No. No. No.
First off, this is theologically completely incorrect. The beatitudes heap blessing on those that mourn, on those who are meek, on those who are poor in spirit — not on those who are safe, secure, financially stable, and proud. Those in crisis are not an illustration of how blessed everyone else is.
In the counter intuitive, upside down way of the Kingdom of God, blessing looks completely different than what we in the West have made it to mean. There are big problems with our use of the word and concept of blessing.
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