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Why Do I Say That?

When someone offers you a compliment, or a word of encouragement and appreciation, how do you respond?

“Oh, don’t mention it, forget about it, it’s nothing . . .”

Have you ever said that? Is that really how you feel? That you really don’t want them to mention it?

I love getting compliments and encouragement . . . but . . . I’ve done the same thing. I brush off the remark as if it is unimportant. Why do I do that? One thought is that I was taught ‘it is more blessed to give than to receive’, so I am often not a good receiver.

I need to hear that I am appreciated. Down deep, I really do want to hear that what I do and what I say has value. Instead, I say, “Oh, don’t mention it . . .”

I’ve written in the past about being ‘present’. An act of kindness — a demonstration of being loving — is to be present to another person. Pay attention to her. Listen to what she is saying. Don’t be so busy with all the things on your mind that you are not ‘present’ with her while she is attempting to say something nice to you. If you brush off her compliment, I’m suggesting that you are not being a good receiver; you are not giving her your attention and your presence.

Genesis 12:2 says, “I will bless you . . . so that you will be a blessing.” So, first, receive the blessing. Accept the compliment. Pay attention to the words of encouragement that are being offered.

Secondly, you will be a blessing to this giving person by truly hearing what she is saying. You will bless her by giving her your attention and your presence. And . . . probably, it will warm your soul so that you are more likely to say something kind to yet another person.


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